


shosenla

by MageOfCole



Series: Cole Does Whumptober 2020 [13]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Blood and Injury, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, Drowning, Drowning on Dry Land, Force Visions, Force-Sensitive Clone Troopers (Star Wars), Gen, Hurt Keeli (Star Wars), Kamino is terrible!!, Keeli (Star Wars) Whump, Keeli Lives, Keeli and Rex are batchmates, Minor Character Death, Oxygen mask, Prophetic Dreams, Prophetic Visions, Whumptober 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27122750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MageOfCole/pseuds/MageOfCole
Summary: (under water)Keeli dreams of drowning; he dreams of his lungs filling as he chokes and gasps, and he dreams of the void dragging him under. It’s on Ryloth that Keeli learns that it was never water he was dreaming of.(No.13 - Breathe In, Breathe Out)
Relationships: Keeli & CT-7567 | Rex
Series: Cole Does Whumptober 2020 [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949908
Comments: 47
Kudos: 102
Collections: Commander Keeli





	shosenla

Keeli dreams of drowning.

He's had the same dream since he was a small cadet, ever since the first time he had seen the thrashing waters outside of the relative safety offered by the cloning facilities. He dreams of liquid filling his lungs, of gasping fruitlessly against the invading feeling, trying to cough it all up again but every attempt just leads to a worse sort of agony. He dreams of floating in nothingness, consciousness fading away with each gasp as fluid bubbles past his lips, catching in his throat because there's nowhere else to go. The burning pain giving away until there's nothing left but oblivion.

He used to stare out at the depthless grey seas that surrounded him at all times, and he'd wonder what it would be like - dying. He’d consider throwing himself into the ocean, desperate to seek out the state of nothingness from his dreams, but a hand would always grasp his own, pulling him from the hypnotic trance the sight of the water always pulled him into. Rex always made sure to be near him, he always seemed to _know_ when a trance would come upon him and he’d be there to pull Keeli back and anchor him until he drew in a shuddering breath. He was desperate not to lose Keeli too, not after what happened to the rest of their batch, and Keeli would always promise to stay afloat. He always knew that he’d die as his lungs filled until they felt as if they would burst, he knew that he’d experience that last thrilling rush of adrenaline before the void would overtake him. He _knew_ the same way Rex always knew the best way to wrangle a victory out of an impossible situation or what choices to make to get the best possible outcome.

He knew how he’d die the same way Rex always knew how to pull him away from the edge. Keeli would smile every time, he’d squeeze Rex’s hand and promise that _he’s still here_. Rex would always stare back, a desperate glint in his eyes that begged Keeli to hold on for just a little bit longer. Keeli always dreamed of drowning, but for Rex - his talented little brother, always so scared of losing what little he had left - Keeli would fight to keep breathing. He’d always known that Rex would be the best of them, but he didn’t want to leave him to face it all alone if he could help him. For Rex, Keeli would stay away from the water and block it’s calls from his ears.

It’s on Ryloth that Keeli learns that it was never water he was dreaming of.

On Ryloth, Keeli learns what it’s like to drown; it’s no longer just a dream. He’s drowning on dry land as blood and bile floods his ruined longs, body aching and burning as more and more bolts tear through him. More and more of his men fall - good, loyal men who had been willing to lay down their lives so that the Twi’leks might live - until it's just Keeli and his General. Keeli is an ARC trooper now, a Captain - he’s no longer a tiny cadet - and when he feels his lungs beginning to fill he refuses to fall out of duty. He’s grown now, a soldier, and he no longer has Rex to pull him back - Rex has his own Legion to run, his own Jedi to watch over, he doesn’t have time to run after a batchmate that already had one foot in the grave - no, it’s just Keeli’s own determination and sense of duty that has him powering forward despite the blood choking him with every strangled breath.

He keeps shooting, even as his body begins to fail, and the oblivion he’s been dreaming of for as long as he can remember inches ever so closer. He continues to fight, to struggle, because the Twi’leks need as much of a head start as they can get and Keeli is determined to give them that.

Keeli keeps fighting until he can’t any longer and another bolt tears through his chest. He drops, helmet long since lost and blood bubbling past his lips. He’d always thought that he’d die in the water, being dragged to the depth of nothingness; Keeli had never imagined that he’d be drowning on dry land, choking on his own blood.

He wheezes, gasps, energy sapped as he instinctively tries to keep breathing, adrenaline still burning in his veins. He’s choking, lungs close to bursting as he coughs up blood in great globs, heart fluttering in his chest like a trapped bird.

He’s dying.

It’s an odd feeling, considering he had been dreaming of his own death for his entire life. His mind is still flying through tactics, trying to come up with any way to continue to do his duty even as his body falls apart. He's going numb, but at the same time everything _hurts_. His lungs _burn_ , desperate for air that Keeli can no longer give them. His throat is clogged with the same blood that fills his aching, throbbing lungs, being pushed past his blue lips with every strangled breath he manages to fight through. His body tries to fight it, but Keeli had always known that he’d die, had accepted it even before he’d gotten the chance to live.

Oblivion is dragging him under. He’s floating in foggy nothingness, and Keeli lets his eyes slide shut as he stops fighting it. Rex isn’t here to drag him back to the surface, isn’t here to be his life raft anymore.

He’ll be the last of them.

He’ll be _alone_.

In the sea of nothingness around him, Keeli sees Rex; the scared, desperate cadet that he had been, his last batchmate after the Longnecks stole everyone else away. He had promised him that he’d keep breathing, that he’d never let himself be swept under if he could still fight his way to the surface, He sees Rex’s silent tears, his slumped shoulders, but he also sees the storm brewing in his little brother’s eyes. Keeli sees the way that that storm had been harnessed by Alpha-17’s tireless work and Cody’s endless determination.

Rex would be the best of them, and Keeli wants to live to see it. He wants to keep fighting at his brother’s side, he wants to see a better future than was made for them. Suddenly, Keeli no longer wants what he had believed to be his fate.

For a moment, Keeli thinks he can hear shouting. He thinks he can hear the sound of fighting, thinks he can feel hands on his body and a voice talking in his ear.

“ _Keeli_. Keeli, keep fighting, _please_.”

And suddenly, Keeli can _breathe_. There’s something on his face, a tightness in his throat, and a pain in his side, but _air_ is being forced into his lungs.

“I’m here, _vod_.” The voice says again, and a hand squeezes his own. “Keep breathing Keeli. Don’t make yourself an oathbreaker, _ori’vod_.”

Rex.

Rex is here, he’s grounding Keeli once again, begging him not to leave him behind too. Keeli had never been able to deny his blond batchmate anything, so he forces himself to breathe. He forces himself to keep fighting while Rex holds onto him, an anchor in the turbulent waters that try to drag him under.

Keeli _breathes_.

**Author's Note:**

> In this universe, the 501st did make it down to the surface of Ryloth, and made it on time to rescue Keeli.


End file.
